For years, I would hear the words denial, enabling, and detachment tossed at me regarding a loved one in my life. I would look back at the person with an expression of utter confusion. When I would ask, “What do you mean?” The answer inevitably came back, “You know, just stop enabling, quit being in denial, or throw them out of the house.” Next I felt ashamed, embarrassed and clueless to make any effective changes. Most of all, I was still lost and confused.

With 50 years of recovery under my belt, encouragement from family and friends, and the wisdom of my Al-Anon mother, I began writing this workbook, Family Recovery Made Simple.

“Old school” language of recovery for the family, in my opinion, is baffling and not very helpful. “New school” language relies on the wisdom of the past but brings it forward into the present in an easier and more understandable way.

I hope you find the new definitions of some formerly puzzling words helpful, applicable, and refreshing.

For instance, when you tell me I am in “denial,” I will look like a deer caught in the headlights.

But if you say, “You seem to be pretending everything is okay.”

I will say, “Yeah, I’ve done that all my life.”  It’s a whole lot easier to stop pretending than to figure out this denial thing.

My goal is to introduce a counterintuitive approach to help you and your loved one with addiction/alcoholism. You will learn new definitions, concepts, and most of all, workable principles. Overall, this workbook is about compassion and kindness for your loved one and, just as importantly, for you.

So, with humor and love, I offer you this fresh approach to the age-old problems of addiction and/or alcoholism.

My best wishes for an amazing journey,
Dennie